Publisher: Gollancz/Penguin Random (Audiobook – 6 June 1996)

Series: Discworld – Book 19/City Watch – Book Three

Length: 12 hours and 20 minutes

My Rating: 5 out of 5 stars

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Even after many, many re-reads, the awesome fantasy satire novel Feet of Clay remains one of my favourite Discworld novels by the late, great Terry Pratchett, with its intricate crime fiction narrative, compelling characters, and even a cool new audiobook version.

I’ve done a lot of Discworld re-reading recently as I have been checking out several of the best books in the series on their new audiobook formats, which featured cool new narrators.  This new format has proven particularly awesome for books like Mort, Pyramids, Moving Pictures and Small Gods, as well as for entries in my favourite Discworld subseries, the City Watch books.

While I have a lot of love for all the books in Terry Pratchett’s Discworld, my absolute favourites come from the City Watch subseries.  Following the unlikely members of the Ankh-Morpork City Watch, a rag-tag team of guards who go from losers to an effective police force, the City Watch books features an exceptional combination of fantasy and crime fiction elements, wrapped up in Pratchett’s usual satirical humour.  The first two books in this series, Guards! Guards! and Men at Arms are quite exceptional, and it was a very easy decision to also check out the epic third novel in the series, Feet of Clay.

After several unlikely but successful investigations, things are looking up for the Ankh-Morpork City Watch.  No longer a home for the dregs of society, the City Watch is now a respected crime-fighting unit.  Led by Commander Sam Vimes, the Watch’s enthusiastic, if unusual, members are determined to bring some law and order to the city of Ankh-Morpork, whether it wants it or not.

However, even with their new resources and members, the Watch find themselves troubled by a series of brutal murders occurring throughout the city.  All the victims were bludgeoned to death, but there is no evidence of anyone alive, or undead, having been at the crime scene.  At the same time, the Patrician of Ankh-Morpork has been poisoned by unknown methods and is only barely clinging to life.  If the Patrician dies, sanity in the city will be the next to fall.

To solve both cases, Vimes and his watchmen will need to investigate an overlooked underclass in the city, the golems, whose ancient secrets and desires may lie at the heart of the killings.  But with desperate conspiracies, unlikely noble heirs and a new deranged king coming to light, can the City Watch uncover the figures pulling the strings in the darkness of Ankh-Morpork before it’s too late?

Wow, how is this book still so damn good?  Feet of Clay was another outstanding read from Terry Pratchett, who once again deeply impresses with his exceptional writing, unmatched humour, and deeply relatable characters.  This third City Watch book is probably some of Pratchett’s very best work, and it gets an extremely easy five-star rating from me.

I absolutely love the great narrative that Pratchett came up with for Feet of Clay, which I personally thinks has one of the author’s best crime fiction narratives behind it, as the complex characters humorously manoeuvre around the gritty streets of Ankh-Morpork.  This book features a fun start that perfectly sets the scene for several of the key characters, including protagonist Sam Vimes’s daily routine of assassins and high society.  You are also quickly thrust into the Watch’s new case involving two elderly academics bludgeoned to death.  These initial investigations, as well as some other great sequences, set the scene for much of the rest of the book, with the narrative becoming even more hectic when Vimes discovers that the Patrician has been poisoned by unknown conspirators.

Afte the initial set-up, the rest of the story flows by extremely fast, with several character-driven storylines that flow together perfectly.  The primary focus is on the two seemingly separate investigations into the murders and the poisonings, with Captain Carrot and Vimes taking control of each case.  Both these major storylines go in some very interesting directions, with Vimes desperately trying to work out how the poisonings happened, while Carrot and Angua begin investigating the city’s golems, one of whom seems responsible for the murders.  At the same time, Pratchett also provides some fantastic character-based storylines around several of the supporting Watch characters. This includes the unusual proclivities of the Watch’s new dwarf officer Corporal Cheery Littlebottom, Corporal Nobby Nobbs’s unbelievable reveal as a potential noble, one golem’s journey towards self-determination, and Angua’s continued feelings of alienation at being a werewolf.

All these storylines cross over perfectly in the final third of Feet of Clay, as the protagonists finally put together the subtle clues for the main two cases.  While the reveal about who or what is behind the murders is fantastic in its own way, I must highlight the extremely well-hidden poisoning method that Pratchett devised for this plot, which is just so damn devious and cleverly set-up by the author.  This leads to an excellent, action-focused collection of sequences that eventually pull together into an intense confrontation.

Pratchett wraps this up perfectly, with some amazing final reveals about who was ultimately pulling all the strings.  While the mastermind of the conspiracy isn’t too surprising (especially if you listen to one of the audiobook versions), the way that Vimes works out their identity is so much fun thanks to some ironically hidden clues, and I love the big reveal scene between Vimes and the main antagonist.  Pratchett also wraps up the remaining storylines perfectly, providing some great final touches to each of the characters’ respective arcs, and ensuring that the readers come away extremely satisfied.  I honestly cannot emphasise enough just how addictive and clever this narrative was, and every single aspect of this plot was perfectly set up and utilised by Pratchett as he wove his fantasy, crime fiction magic.

I’ve always felt that Feet of Clay was one of Pratchett’s best-written novels, as he manages to expertly balance a range of competing storylines inside this highly entertaining, hybrid novel.  As with all his City Watch books, the way that Pratchett manages to blend fantasy and crime fiction elements with his usual brilliant humour is just incredible, and I love how well this mixture of elements works to tell an effective narrative.  I must particularly commend the great mystery in Feet of Clay, which is just so damn intricate with all its clues and mixture of compelling character storylines.  Feet of Clay easily has some of Pratchett’s best mystery writing in its plot, and there is an outstanding amount of complexity built into both cases, with the truly elaborate poisoning arc being a particular highlight.  The sheer amount of cleverly crafted and often humorous clues that the author scatters throughout the book is so damn awesome, and it is so much fun to pull them all together.

The book’s outstanding crime fiction elements are perfectly enhanced by the background fantasy elements of the setting, with the protagonists forced to investigate the crimes in the context of a chaotic city populated with different species.  Compared to previous books, the investigation in Feet of Clay is much more like a modern police procedural, with classic forensic concepts enhanced with fantasy elements like scent tracking done by a werewolf and crime scene photos drawn by imps.  The protagonists also need to deal with various fantasy creatures, such as golems, vampires, dwarfs and a very angry gnome, and understanding their motivations becomes a key part of the plot.  Pratchett also uses these fantasy elements to address and lightly satirise contemporary social trends.  For example, one dwarf’s attempt to find herself leads to a complex, nuanced and thought-provoking discussion on gender identity, which can still be readily applied to modern discourses on transgendered rights and modern gender norms.  Another storyline focusing on golems gaining free will is also highly relevant, especially when you consider artificial intelligence.  Throw in the general chaos and disorder of the city, which results in additional fun conflicts and incidents (Vimes’s one-sided battle against the Assassins Guild is particularly amusing), as well as a focus on the changes that have occurred to Ankh-Morpork thanks to the actions of the Patrician and the Watch, and you really have to appreciate just how fell the inherent fantasy elements of Feet of Clay enhances the plot.

While both the mystery and fantasy elements of Feet of Clay are very compelling, what really turns this into a five-star read is the clever humour that Pratchett adds to his books.  There are various layers to the humour in this novel, although much of it lies in classic fantasy or murder mystery scenarios going in particularly absurd directions, or being artfully dissected by self-aware protagonists who find the situation and its real-world historical precedent very absurd.  There are also the brilliant footnotes that seek to enhance the story and showcase just how ridiculous the Discworld is by providing additional details about the universe and the people within it.  Finally, you have humour driven by the outrageous characters scattered throughout the plot, with ultra-sarcastic figures rubbing shoulders with entertaining parodies of terrible people.  The more direct humour drawn from the storylines of several of these characters, such as Corporal Nobbs’s foray into the upper class, and Sergeant Colon unfortunate agricultural experiences, blends well with the rest of the complex novel, and ensures that there are entertaining moments, no matter where in Feet in Clay you are.

This great combination of humour, fantasy elements and a crime fiction narrative helps to make Feet of Clay one of the more appealing novels in all the Discworld series, and so many different readers will end up getting a lot out of it.  As such, Feet of Clay works incredibly well as a standalone novel, with new readers easily able to enjoy this book without any prior knowledge of the Discworld or previous City Watch books, especially as Pratchett covers any relevant history or characters quite effectively.  However, I do feel that to get the best experience with Feet of Clay, readers would benefit from checking out Guards! Guards! and Men at Arms first.  The continuing storylines, history of the city and character arcs all come into play extremely well in Feet of Clay and you get a much more complete experience viewing all City Watch novels in order.

As with all of Pratchett’s novels, one of the real joys of Feet of Clay is the complex and comedic characters the author weaved such incredible, entertaining, and often extremely heartwarming tales around.  Featuring a great combination of the well-established cast of the previous City Watch books, as well as a couple of awesome new figures, Pratchett did an exceptional job diving into the cast of his novel and the resulting depth to their characters was so damn impressive.

At the centre of Feet of Clay lies main character Commander Samuel Vimes, the recently ennobled and married commander of the City Watch.  Transformed from a drunken and hated figure to the leader of a respected police organisation, Vimes has been forced to up his game, especially as he now finds himself being targeted by the elites of the city which he does with some comedic vigour.  Feet of Clay is probably the book where Pratchett twists the focus of the City Watch fully towards Vimes.  The definite centre of the plot, Pratchett really dives into Vimes’s obsessive nature, his simmering anger at the upper classes, and his determination to bring justice to everyone equally.  Vimes dogged, yet cynical, approach to investigation and crime solving comes face to face with a particularly dastardly plot in Feet of Clay, and there are some wonderful sequences as he tries to puzzle out the poisoning.  Pratchett also provides some extra detail about Vimes’ poor upbringing and the history of his family, which really showcases his motivations to a great degree.  All this allows for a much more complicated figure then we saw in previous books, and it was an interesting change of pace for this central character that Pratchett would expand on in later books.

In addition to Vimes, there are some interesting focuses on Captain Carrot and Constable Angua, who led the investigation into the murders in the city, and Pratchett wraps some compelling elements around them.  Carrot remains the charismatic and skilled leader of men for much of the story, with a continued focus on his love for the city and ability to charm anyone he encounters.  However, Pratchett does attempt to break his seemingly perfect facade in this novel by having him struggle to come to terms with Cheery Littlebottom’s identity issues.  The author also continues to shift away from Carrot as a perspective character, instead allowing his many appearances to be mainly told from the view of other, more cynical members of the cast.  This gives his actions and motivations a little more mystery and allows the reader to wonder just how perfect he really is.  For Feet of Clay, most of this narration was done by Angua, the Watch’s werewolf officer and Carrot’s love interest.  Angua proves to be a very practical and sarcastic personality foil to the upbeat Carrot, which helps to humanise both to a degree.  Pratchett also adds in a compelling underlying storyline of Angua struggling with how others perceive her as a werewolf, and her certainty that her relationship with Carrot can’t last.

While Carrot and Angua represent the more serious side of the Watch, Pratchett continues to have fun by focusing on the always amusing and comedic duo of Sergeant Fred Colon and Corporal Nobby Nobbs.  Their narrative in Feet of Clay is particularly good, especially for Nobby, who finds himself elevated to nobility status when it is discovered he is the long-lost descendant of the Earl of Ankh.  Suddenly forced to hobnob with other nobs, Nobby has some fantastic reactions and interactions, especially going from despair at being a penniless noble, to trying to fit in with the city’s elite.  While this seems like a mostly comedic storyline to undercut the tension of Feet of Clay’s serious crimes it fits into the main narrative in some clever ways, although Nobby’s reaction when he finds this out is so damn funny and perfectly reflects his own mentality and his knowledge of Vimes’ reactions.

Sergeant Colon, on the other hand, is somewhat less used in Feet of Clay, although Pratchett has fun satirising the ‘policeman three days away from retirement’ trope through him.  Keen to get out of the Watch because his wife wants him to buy a farm (another subtle and fun joke from Pratchett), Colon inevitably runs into insane trouble in the second half of the book, and it was fun to see the craziness of the other storylines literally stampede over him.  I have loved these two characters since their first appearance in Guards! Guards! and this is one of their funniest books (although their next appearance in Jingo is also peak comedy).

While these recurring characters are awesome, special mention needs to go to the new members of the Watch that Pratchett introduces in Feet of Clay, who have major impacts on the plot.  The most significant of this is the new dwarf forensic officer, Corporal Cheery Littlebottom (a very traditional dwarf name).  Cheery serves as a compelling outsider figure, with Pratchett moving her across both investigations.  However, it’s her characterisation as a female dwarf who wants to acknowledge her gender rather than act like a male dwarf, as is tradition, that really sets Cheery up as a standout character.  Naturally working in aspects of identity and overcoming established mindsets are a big part of Cheery’s character, and it was wonderful to see her gain confidence and skill as a Watch officer.  Pratchett did such an excellent job of handling these complex cultural elements through Cheery, and it’s amazing how significant Cheery’s actions are in the larger Discworld narrative, as well as how relevant they are today.

Other characters I need to mention as I finally wrap up this section include the mysterious golem Dorfl.  A voiceless and dutiful figure that is part of the city’s exploited golem underclass, Dorfl has a compelling connection to the murders in Feet of Clay and serves as an unlikely witness and suspect.  Pratchett writes a particularly compelling motivation around Dorfl’s actions in this novel, which cleverly ties into discussion about self-determination and artificial intelligence.  I also had a lot of fun with Dorfl’s later scenes, especially as he becomes the city’s most unexpected and dramatic revolutionary.  Other highlights for me include Lord Vetinari, who takes his role as a poison victim with his usual special interest.  Throw in an ancient vampire with a love of terrible puns, an extremely angry gnome, and other compelling characters dragged into the narrative’s web, and the cast of Feet of Clay was one of Pratchett’s strongest, especially with all the emotional impact they add to the plot.

As with all the other Discworld novels I have reviewed, I have enjoyed Feet of Clay on various formats over the years, but my favourite is once again its audiobook version.  The various audiobook releases are always the absolute best ways to enjoy a Discworld novel, and the fantastic humour, compelling characters and entertaining locations that Pratchett comes up with, always come across in impressive fashion when read out.  This is especially true for Feet of Clay, which, like many of the series, has had several different audiobook versions over the years.  This includes the classic version released back in 1997, featuring narration by one of my favourite audiobook narrators, the legendary Nigel Planer.  I have raved about Planer in several previous reviews, including for Guards! Guards! and Men at Arms, and few narrators can capture Pratchett’s style and comedic charm with their voices like Planer did.  His work narrating Feet of Clay was particularly impressive, especially with his portrayal of all the cool characters, including an over-the-top vampire, the new dwarf member of the watch, and more.  The Planer narration of this novel is probably the definitive Feet of Clay audiobook, and I have been in love with this version since I was a child.

I also need to highlight the new audiobook released a couple of years ago.  Featuring the very impressive cast of Jon Culshaw, Peter Serafinowicz and Bill Nighy, this more recent Feet of Clay release was also very exceptional, building off the great work these three narrators did with their Guards! Guards! and Men at Arms audiobooks.  Coming in with a runtime of 12 hours and 20 minutes, this Feet of Clay audiobook is a bit longer than the Planer release (which had a runtime of 9 hours and 38 minutes), although listeners are still in for an exceptional time.  Much of this is down to British radio and television personality Jon Culshaw, who once again made this audiobook his own with his take on the story and his characters.  His gritty and entertaining voices for the cast are very fitting, and like Planer, he excels at showcasing their complicated personalities, as well as the overall humour of the book.  I am once again very impressed with just how excellent Culshaw was for the City Watch books, and he is my favourite narrator from these new Discworld audiobooks.

As with all books in this new collection of Discworld audiobook’s, Culshaw’s main narration was perfectly backed up by recuring voices of Bill Nighy and Peter Serafinowicz.  These performances were once again perfect, and I especially loved Nighy’s excellent work with the vital, comedic footnotes. Serafinowicz’s role in Feet of Clay is also very fun, as he brings the fan-favourite character of Death to life.  While Death only has a few scenes in Feet of Clay, Serafinowicz makes the most of his appearances, and hearing the actor’s deep Death voice suddenly appear amongst the general narration really increases the impact of the character.  Both Bill Nighy and Peter Serafinowicz’s inclusions were extremely fun, and I felt that they were combined with Culshaw’s main narration in a very impressive way.  These three brilliant British talents ensured that the new version of Feet of Clay was particularly impressive and while my heart will always belong to the original audiobook with Nigel Planer, this new multi-cast audiobook will likely inspire a new generation of Discworld fans.

With an incredible and winning combination of charm, mystery and comedic brilliance, Feet of Clay was another exceptional and classic read in Terry Pratchett’s Discworld.  Providing an ultra-addictive story that also perfectly adds in some great new characters, Feet of Clay is one of the very best Discworld books, and one of my personal favourites.  An exceptional read I will recommend until the day I die!

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